‘Twas the night before we reached Larry’s, when all through the ship
All we heard was humping, and thumping, and shit;
Calvereena was hung, and slipped inspit Pot,
In hopes he’d get high while Pot was red hot;
Blinky and Awesome were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of Nazi’s danced in their heads;
And Jeffers in his banana hammock, and I in my cape,
Had just settled down for a long winter’s rape,
When out of our cells there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the cell bars I flew like the flash,
Red spandex tights with a lightning bolt on my ass.
The moon and the breast of a brand new ho’
Gave the lustre of Vegas to us down below,
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature pimp, and eight tiny queers,
With a bunny rabbit shaped man, so ownry and harry,
I knew in a moment it must be that dick Larry.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he grunted, and moaned, and called them us name;
“Now, Blinky! now, Pot! now Cal and that Jeffers!
Lt. Awesome Stance! Nonly and Kettle you heffer!
To the top of you feet! faces firm to thew wall!
Now drop ’em! drop ’em! pants and all!”
As dry asses shine before Larry’s dropped fly,
The boys clench their legs, so fruitful and shy,
So out to the window young Jeffers flew,
He saw darkness, stars and planets too .
And then, in a twinkling, Larry said with a woof
“Get back in line Jeffers, you wont make it to the rook!
I slowly stalked from that and turned around,
Down on my backside Larry came with a bound!
He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
Rape gaze in his eyes, with his hand he then put;
it softly and gently and grazing my back,
His other hand firmly, and strongly rubbing his sack.
His eyes — how they twinkled! his nipples how merry!
His ass cheeks were like roses, his testicles a cherry!
His drool on his mouth was dripping like a hoe,
That thing in his pants, hard as a dildo;
The stump of a joint he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath;
He had a rabbit face and a little red nose,
A dark green mohawk, and tears in his clothes.
He was smelly and sticky, and in very bad health,
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know I had everything to dread;
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
He took of his stocking; then started to jerk,
And laying his finger with coke in his nose,
And giving a nod, up my chimney he rose;
A spring in his step, he gave me a whistle,
his corn cob pipe felt just like a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, in extreme delight,
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-nigh!”